On Saturday night I did not want to be at work. I came in and immediately wanted to leave. It was snowing and the bar was empty. I was standing at the end of the bar at about 7pm, looking out the door at the falling snow. An occasional regular who I have known for years, asked me what I was so sad about. I told him I was missing putting my little ones to bed, singing the monster songs, and smelling their freshly washed heads. He replied quickly, I have a daughter. I looked at him quizzically and said, huh?
He told me a story of being a young teenaged Dad of a single mom. The very Catholic parents of his girlfriend were very upset when he would not marry their daughter when they were 16 and she was pregnant. When the baby girl was born he struggled to stay in the baby’s life but things were different almost 30 years ago and Dad’s didn’t have as many rights. His single Mom was entrenched with her own custody battle and did not have the money to help with his. So slowly his girlfriends parents forced my friend, ML out of his daughter M’s life. He and his Mom tried but they were stonewalled by the Catholic grandparents for years.
My friend told me last month his daughter found him on the internet. They have been emailing back and forth more than once a day since the new year. She knows how controlling her now dead grandparents were. He said they were discussing meeting soon and his excitement. He told me of her creative side and how they look exactly alike. He spoke of sharing tastes in music, literature, and food. He was so looking forward to building a relationship with her.
About twenty minutes later my friend moved to the other side of the bar. He called me over and introduced his daughter! I exclaimed, we were just talking about you! She was out with some friends and they just happened upon the bar where her Dad was hanging out. They hugged and hugged, and talked into the night. As they hugged I had to retreat to the back of the bar and cry. What an emotional night! She looked exactly like ML and even wore the same exact glasses. It was crazy.
After she left, ML told me he was never going to let her go again. He wanted to be there for all the first she has left in her life. He kept talking with tears in his eyes. Soon after he left to process the events of the evening. It was so nice to watch a family undo the wrongs of the past and reconnect. It is a night that I will not forget for a long time.
